Family First

by Cindy Hsu
NEW YORK (CBS) ― If your kids have dreams of breaking into careers that are incredibly risky such as professional athlete or rock star, what's a parent to do?

Dr. Asif Khan and members of the band "Johnny Hi-Fi" have managed to balance their day jobs with their passion for music. They're now helping college students throughout the country strike that balance with seminars called Passion & Profession.

Why did you and the band start Passion and Profession?
Coincidentally, we each experienced a great amount of pressure from our parents to pursue a traditional profession -- i.e. doctor, lawyer, engineer -- while feeling this innate desire to play music. After sharing our experiences, we decided that our stories could benefit students. We were then approached by a coordinator of multicultural affairs at a major university who witnessed a large volume of students approaching him with these exact issues, trying to satisfy parent's desires while feeling underlying passions to pursue something else. So we decided to bring our stories to the students in the form of an educational career-oriented seminar with diversity initiatives, called Passion and Profession.

What is your story?
Music is relatively taboo in a Muslim household other than just drums. When my parents began noticing my pursuit of rock music, they were quite adamant that I stop this and focus on my studies. Therefore, I stopped playing between the ages of 17 and 27 (after only playing for about 1.5 years), to finish my medical education. Once in residency and earning personal income, I revisited my passion, having never lost it, by going on to tour Ireland, Taiwan, playing over 400 shows, recording five CDs and making two videos. And its not slowing down.

What struggles are the students sharing with you?
Stories vary from the simple to extreme measures by some. For example, one young petite Chinese girl, pre-med major had this underlying passion to become a motor-cross biker. We also heard of a troubling decision a student made, which involved ending a successful college education three credits short from graduation in order to pursue an artistic career, explaining that his heart wasn't into it anymore.

What solutions do you give to the students?
1. First and foremost, FINISH your education!
2. Explain your passion to yourself. Is it really a passion or just a hobby? And is the pursuit enjoyable?
3. Explain your passion to your parents
4. Involve your parents with your passion
5. Students: POLICE yourselves. If your studies are suffering, you must place your passion on the backburner
6. Your profession can only help fuel your passion
7. Don't expect your passion to necessarily generate income. It's a source of pure pleasure, and if you look to your passion to survive, you MIGHT begin to resent it. Don't let that happen
8. See No. 1

Any tips for parents on this issue?
1. Listen to the child
2. Participate in the child's desires
3. Support their passions, For example, a child saying 'I want to be a rock star' is no different than supporting a child who approaches the parent and states 'I want to be a doctor'. What we mean by this is that not everyone is capable of becoming a well-functioning doctor, much the same that not everyone can be an artist. In the end, if you support the child regardless, they will realize if they are capable of either.

What skills do students need to balance their passion and profession?
1. Time management skills. i.e. prioritize the hours outside of class. That is, when should I play X-box, study, eat and pursuing their passion.
2. Police themselves to prevent their grades from suffering
3. Seek and accept support from friends and families, and like-minded individuals

What do you think would happen if you didn't follow your passion for music?
Hard to think about, and I know I would have an inordinate amount of regret. It probably would have an effect on my social skills and development as a well-rounded member of the community. For example, without music, I wouldn't have pursued certain friendships, or even this concept of a seminar to help others.

Final thoughts?
With the latest attention () placed on the alarming rates of high school dropouts( TIME magazine cover story: Dropout Nation and The Happy Class at Harvard run by Tal Ben-Shahar), any parent, educator or administrator of student/youth services requires every possible tool to combat these horrible decisions made on a daily basis. To connect with youth requires skill, dedication, honesty and resolve, and we are here to help.

Passion & Profession Web Site

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